Feeling lonely?Simple 5-3-1 rule could help you make more connections

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Social connectionis known to be a key factor in overall health and well-being.

About one in six people worldwide experience loneliness, which is linked to around 871,000 deaths annually due toimpacts on health, according to the World Health Organization.

One approach gaining attention is the 5-3-1 rule, a simple framework designed to help people build and maintain social relationships in everyday life.

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The rule was reportedly developed by Canadian sociologist Kasley Killam, who argues that social health should be treated with the same consistency as physical ormental health.

“We need to be intentional about connection, just like we are with exercise and eating healthy foods,” Killam recently toldBusiness Insider.

Group of friends smiling and clinking wine glasses around a dining table in a cozy, modern home setting.

The 5-3-1 rule treats social connection as a daily health habit with simple, consistent goals.(iStock)

The 5-3-1 rule encourages social connection with three clear targets, as listed below.

5:Each week, spend time with five different people orsocial groups, such as friends, family members, coworkers, neighbors or acquaintances.

3:Each month, have three deeper conversations with people you trust, where interactions go beyond small talk.

1:Each day, aim for about one hour of social interaction, even if that time is spread out across shorter moments.

Two women walking together in a park on a sunny day, smiling and talking while enjoying an outdoor stroll.

The rule encourages intentional connection by prioritizing a weekly variety in relationships, monthly deep conversations and daily social time.(iStock)

Jess Diller Kovler, a New York-based psychologist with Well By Messer and the Cognitive Therapy Center of Manhattan, said frameworks like the 5-3-1 rule are especially relevant right now.

“We need this now, more than ever,�

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She pointed out that many people underestimate how isolated they are, asmodern communications, such as texting or social media, cannot fully substitute for face-to-face interaction.

Volunteer smiling and greeting participants at a community outreach event in a public park.

The 5-3-1 rule may benefit people who depend heavily on texting and social media for their social interaction.(iStock)

The framework is meant to serve as a guideline, not something that needs to be followed perfectly, Kovler noted.

“Whether it’s 5-3-1 or 1-2-3 or 1-3-5 doesn’t matter.Anything beats zero-zero-zero,” she said.

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Jonathan Alpert, a New York-based psychotherapist and author of “Therapy Nation,�com/category/lifestyle/relationships" target="_blank" rel="noopener">building stronger social connectionsoften starts with small, consistent steps rather than dramatic changes.

Middle-aged couple sitting at a café table, smiling and sharing a moment together, showing how social connection supports relationships and well-being.

The framework is intended as a flexible guide rather than a strict formula, and experts noted that any effort toward connection is better than none.(iStock)

Alpert suggested choosing activities that create familiarity over time. 

“Join a class, volunteer or show up regularly at the same gym or café.Familiarity builds comfort, and comfort builds relationships,” he said.

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The expert also encouraged people tobe more proactive. 

“Instead of waiting for others to reach out, send the first text.Suggest the coffee.Most people want more connection but don’t know how to start.”

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